Dating rules after divorce
Three: Release Expectations and View Each Encounter as a Lesson This is a big one. If you enter each date excepting a positive experience, you will be disappointed at least some of the time.
If you approach the meeting as a lesson, you will never be let down and you will gain valuable (or at least interesting) information in the meantime.♦◊♦Four: Be True to Yourself The period after divorce is a vulnerable time.
It was a known and safe place for me, but not exactly an ideal way to date. Learn to find comfort in the process and the path of dating, rather than being focused on a destination.You may be surprised to realize that there are aspects of your ex that you want again or perhaps characteristics that were not important before but are now.For me, my ex was never a match for me physically (I’m not talking about intimacy here; we were an excellent match in the bedroom).Two: Your “Must Not Haves”This list compliments the one above and, in fact, you may find that it is generated at the same time. Even the ambiguous will have meaning to you as you meet people.Like with your “must haves,” you may find that some of these are rather concrete and others are vague and hard to define. Two of my items on the “must not have” list were 1) cannot be dishonest (uhmm..great. ) and 2) cannot have kids or want kids (I have pretty strong feelings on this one and it’s not fair to start a relationship with someone who does not match me here). Just let that thought go like a helium balloon in the wind. Not every date you go one will be good, but every date you go one will teach you something.
Once you have your lists generated, keep them handy and allow them to be modified or updated as you date and meet new people. Try to enter every encounter with an open and curious mind, ready to receive the lessons to come.